Holiday Frankenpost 2024!

So that you can't say I never gave ya nothin' (yeah, yeah, I can't stop you from sayin' it, but we'll all know you're lyin'), here's a post I've cobbled together from some old body parts I dug out of the basement past posts and whatnot. Merry Whatever, ya filthy animals.

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If you're wanting Xmas goofery to read, you can't go goofier than Christopher Moore's The Stupidest Angel: A Heartwarming Tale of Christmas Terror. (I mean, if you can, I'd love to know how.) Yes, it's kinda the third book in an unofficial trilogy, but you needn't read the first two books to enjoy this one, technically. (Though if you're a compulsive completist like me, you can check out the first one here, and the second here.) (Nearly forgot, there are a couple of characters in The Stupidest Angel that don't appear in either Pine Cove book linked above, but are featured here.)

Words, wOrds, WoRDS

Oh, hey! It's been a while since we played my little word-association game, innit? Up for another round? (Pretend you are, no one need know the truth...)

Using Random Word at watchout4snakes, I'm going to toss out a word and you're going to share the first thing that comes to your mind in the comments section below.

You will share, won't you? Pretty please?


Today's random word is...

Twelve 21st C. Scares

And to wrap up my #SpookySZN blog series, here are some 21st Century movies that wigged me out. As in previous posts, they're in chronological order; click the title for their IMDB pages, which will tell you more about them and also where you can stream them.

PS: Once again, my selection criteria was 1. What have I loved, 2. What can be found on one of the big three streaming services (Amazon Prime Video, Hulu, & Netflix) OR free (with commercials) on sites like Plex, Pluto, and Tubi, and 3.What I haven't already blogged about.

PPS: Some of these have comical elements but none of them are recommended for folks just dipping their toes into the horror genre. Viewer discretion is seriously advised!

Ten 21st Century Horror Comedies

This post does what it sez on the tin, folks: I present for your viewing pleasure (trailers below!) some of my fave horror comedy flicks (so far!) since we entered this maniacal millennium. As with last week's post, you're getting them in chronological order; click the title for their IMDB pages, which will tell you more about them and also where you can stream them.

PS: Also like my last post, my selection criteria was 1. What have I loved, 2. What can be found on one of the big three streaming services (Amazon Prime Video, Hulu, & Netflix) OR free (with commercials) on sites like Plex, Pluto, and Tubi, and 3.What I haven't already blogged about.

PPS: Just 'cause they're funny don't mean they ain't gots the scares and the gore. Viewer discretion advised.

Thirteen Terrifying 21st Century TV Shows

I have to admit, I'm using the term "terrifying" loosely, here. A bunch of these could be considered "horror-dramas," some are "quirky-horror-dramas," a few "horror comedies," and only a wee handful properly "terrifying." (I'll let you know which are which.) I loves 'em and they're all worth a watch. You're getting them in chronological order; click the title for their IMDB pages, which will tell you more about them and also where you can stream them.

PS: My selection criteria was 1. What have I loved, 2. What can be found on one of the big three streaming services (Amazon Prime Video, Hulu, & Netflix) OR free (with commercials) on sites like Plex, Pluto, and Tubi, etc., and 3. What have I not blogged about already?

15 Fave Freaky Fictions

And by "fictions," I mean "books" but, you know, #alliteration. Here are 15 of my fave scary reads (so far), in order of publication date bc the idea of trying to rank them makes me feel faint. They're linked to their Goodreads pages, where you'll find buy links so you can check out pricing at your purveyor of choice, if you're so inclined. Publishers' book blurbs are in purple italics; my thoughts follow.

31 Tunes of Terror

Those who know me probably wish they didn't know that I heart me some spoopy tuneage. So here's my YouTube playlist for Halloween 2024, with slightly over two hours of music to groove to while you're carving your pumpkin(s) and whatnot. I've written a blurb about each piece as well, but fortune favors the bold or some such motivational bullshit, so I'd recommend playing the tracks first.* 

*Uh, watch out for that last video, tho, 'cause it's got some freaky film footage that might not be suitable for all audiences. Just sayin'...

1 | Halloween ~ Caspro

• A thicc synth take on the theme from the Halloween franchise that you can shake your bootie to without fear of it being sliced off by Michael Myers.

Terror Teaser and a Repost

The Terror Teaser

This October, watch this spot for some peculiar, possibly perilous, and probably possessed posts for Spooooooookyyyyyyy Seeeeeeeeasooooon 2024. My Reign of Terror begins next week with my first love, music, so be sure to tune in* for your Halloween decorating soundtrack.

*see what I did there?

The Repost

Here's an entry from my 2013 series, Aphrodisiacs from A to Z, which touched on the various things believed to rev up folks' motors in the sex-ay department. This was my H entry, Horror Movies, and may have* some tweaks, as well as new nonsense sprinkled in here and there.

*it definitely does

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Horror movies have been popular from the beginning of cinematic history, in large part pushed by young Hollywood for their very commercial scariness. Why so commercial? They reckoned fellas would take their gals to the local drive-in, so the chicks could get spooked right into their letterman-jacket-clad arms, and voila—sexy-fun good times in your dad's Buick. Well, OK, there's a bit of truth to the fact that getting freaked out makes you seek comfort, but sexual healing? Really?

Yes, in actual fact. Really.

Review: Suburban Hell by Maureen Kilmer

Dig that groovy cover, y'all!
(But please ignore my thumb.)

Suburban Hell by Maureen Kilmer 

My rating: 4 of 5 stars*
*3.5 stars rounded up to 4.

About the book:

A Chicago cul-de-sac is about to get a new neighbor...of the demonic kind.

Amy Foster considers herself lucky. After she left the city and moved to the suburbs, she found her place quickly with neighbors Liz, Jess, and Melissa, snarking together from the outskirts of the PTA crowd. One night during their monthly wine get-together, the crew concoct a plan for a clubhouse She Shed in Liz’s backyard—a space for just them, no spouses or kids allowed.

But the night after they christen the She Shed, things start to feel . . . off. They didn’t expect Liz’s little home-improvement project to release a demonic force that turns their quiet enclave into something out of a nightmare. And that’s before the homeowners’ association gets wind of it.

Even the calmest moms can’t justify the strange burn marks, self-moving dolls, and horrible smells surrounding their possessed friend, Liz. Together, Amy, Jess, and Melissa must fight the evil spirit to save Liz and the neighborhood . . . before the suburbs go completely to hell.

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Tuneage ~ Cannons

Cannons has been around for a little over a decade but they're relatively new to me. Allmusic's Marcy Donelson describes their sound as a "...blend of shimmery electro-pop and sultry dance-rock," which pretty much nails it. As Cannons formed in L.A., it's apt that their music conjures up images of twilight drives on California's Pacific Coast Highway.

The first Cannons tune I recall hearing is Bad Dream, from their album Fever Dream. If the hypnotic beat weren't enough to capture my attention, the lyrics were:

I been living in a bad, bad dream
Sleepwalking through a sad scene 

I mean, #relateable.

 

Review: The Haunting of Velkwood by Gwendolyn Kiste

The Haunting of Velkwood by Gwendolyn Kiste
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

About the book:

From Bram Stoker Award­–winning author Gwendolyn Kiste comes a chilling novel about three childhood friends who miraculously survive the night everyone in their suburban neighborhood turned into ghosts—perfect for fans of Yellowjackets.

The Velkwood Vicinity was the topic of occult theorists, tabloid one-hour documentaries, and even some pseudo-scientific investigations as the block of homes disappeared behind a near-impenetrable veil that only three survivors could enter—and only one has in the past twenty years, until now.

Talitha Velkwood has avoided anything to do with the tragedy that took her mother and eight-year-old sister, drifting from one job to another, never settling anywhere or with anyone, feeling as trapped by her past as if she was still there in the small town she so desperately wanted to escape from. When a new researcher tracks her down and offers to pay her to come back to enter the vicinity, Talitha claims she’s just doing it for the money. Of all the crackpot theories over the years, no one has discovered what happened the night Talitha, her estranged, former best friend Brett, and Grace, escaped their homes twenty years ago. Will she finally get the answers she’s been looking for all these years, or is this just another dead end?

Award-winning author Gwendolyn Kiste has created a suburban ghost story about a small town that trapped three young women who must confront the past if they’re going to have a future.

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I won an uncorrected Advance Reader Copy of this book from Saga Press, via Goodreads Giveaway--thanks so much! Here are my thoughts: